Chapter
4
Elizabeth
sat by the window seat of the drawing room observing the perfect blanket of
snow that covered the landscape of Longbourn’s
garden, preparing herself for the arrival of her husband-to-be. Anybody seeing
her would say that she was the picture of sadness.
What
will I do now? Elizabeth
wondered as she thought of every possible method that would help her escape her
unpleasant future. When her father departed for London in pursuit of Mr. Darcy, she had never
imagined that their meeting would result on an engagement to the man for whom
she had so little respect. In fact, she had secretly hoped, nay, wished that
the gentleman would refuse to consent to enter an alliance of any sort with
her. Even with the knowledge that his negative would damage her reputation
forever, Elizabeth
was fully convinced that total disgrace was better than an unhappy, forced
union to the man she hated most. All the most horrid destinies she had thought
of –and Elizabeth
was universally known for having an extremely fertile imagination--, were more
appealing than the prospect of marrying Mr. Darcy.
With a
melodramatic sigh of resignation, Elizabeth
accepted that soon she would become the new Mrs. Darcy. If she wanted to assure
herself a minimum amount of happiness as a married woman, she should at least
try to see her future husband in a more benign light.
Following
Jane’s advice, Elizabeth
focused on the task of pointing out her future husband’s most positive
assets. At least he is not Mr. Collins, she recalled her sister’s
words. The gentleman had to possess other qualities besides being tall
and fit and presentable and rich. Brow furrowed in concentration, Elizabeth tried harder.
Well, she could not deny he was handsome, not in the traditional way, but
handsome nonetheless. He also had a distinguished air that occasionally she
found quite becoming. He was a good reader and though they had not conversed
much, he has shown her he was the possessor of an informed and sharp mind. He
was a skilled rider and an elegant dancer, too. No, Darcy and Collins could not
be compared, neither physically nor mentally. The sensations that the parson
produced in her were close to repulsion while Darcy … she could not
decide yet because it was mostly confusion what she felt when she thought of
him. Even her body had this distracting tendency to react involuntary to his
presence, most of the time warming up and unsettling her stomach when he was
close. Sometimes her feelings for him were close to annoyance, other times it
was just uneasiness. Still there was one emotion that she knew was never
connected to Mr. Darcy’s person, and that was indifference. No, she may
not have felt attracted to the gentleman yet she knew she had never been indifferent
to him.
But she
had never been indifferent to Mr. Wickham either, Elizabeth reflected with a
loud sigh, this way putting an end to this brief lapse where she allowed
herself to portray her future husband in a better light. And as it usually
happened when the charming officer came into scene, her fiancée didn’t
stand a chance and was one more time depicted in a less generous way. Wickham was equally tall, and handsome
–in the traditional way, Elizabeth
decided-- and ever more amiable. Wickham did not take advantage of
defenceless maidens. Mr. Wickham was ten times more gentlemanlike than Mr.
Darcy.
Fully
convinced that she would never be able to love or respect her future husband, Elizabeth left her post
at the window and went to the kitchen to help Hill with the preparations for
the arrival of her illustrious fiancée. All charitable thoughts of the proud
Mr. Darcy were promptly dismissed as unsuitable and inaccurate and the
gentleman was placed once more at the top of her list of the most detestable
people she had ever met.
Mr. Darcy
arrived at Longbourn two hours later, carrying the
papers his solicitor had prepared for Mr. Bennet to
sign. The engaged couple greeted each other with awkwardness, quite expected
given they way they parted the last time they were in each other’s
company. Darcy, though apparently calm, was not completely at ease with his
present circumstance and preferred to stick to formalities when in the company
of his in laws. The unhappy bride-to-be was as cold and distant as civility
allowed.
No social
engagements where planned during the gentleman’s visit so Darcy and Elizabeth would have plenty of time to spend in each
other’s company. However, Elizabeth
tried to avoid her fiancée’s presence the best she could but all her
efforts seemed to be in vain, as her mother was constantly scheming against
her. She contrived to come up with most unusual situations possible in order to
leave the young ‘lovers’ by themselves.
On one
occasion, Mrs Bennet even ambushed Elizabeth, calling her to the library where
she knew Mr. Darcy was reading a book. Elizabeth
had no other choice but to sit by him and make some futile attempts at
conversation that the gentleman seemed at best uninterested to discuss. When
she was done commenting the weather and the most common topics, the lack of
participation of her partner told her that he might be above these
trivialities. So she concentrated her efforts on a subject that was of her
particular interest and started a line of questioning especially designed to
disturb her fiancée.
“Did
you happen to see Mr. Bingley during your stay in London, Mr. Darcy?”
Darcy
lifted his eyes from his book and shifted his body to face her. He responded
briefly, not wishing to extend himself on this matter. “Yes, I
did.”
Not
satisfied with his succinct reply, Elizabeth
insisted. “He and his sisters were well, I hope, when you left London.”
“Perfectly
so, I thank you.” He offered with a smile and returned his eyes to his
book.
Elizabeth did not avert her
gaze from his face and wondered what was so important about his reading that he
could not distract his attention from it for more than a second. She was asking
about his good friend, a subject that she imagined would also be of
Darcy’s liking and one of which she was eager to learn more.
“And
... did Mr Bingley mention if he had plans of returning to Hertfordshire in the
future?”
“I
doubt it. Bingley is in Wales
for the winter. I do not believe he will be back in the immediate future.”
“Oh.”
Elizabeth was
slightly startled by this intelligence. “Then it would be better for the
neighbourhood if he let go the place entirely if he has no intention of ever
returning to Netherfield, for then we might possibly
get a settled family there.”
“Perhaps
he might do so as soon as he finds an eligible purchase offer for
it.”
Elizabeth detected certain
discomfiture in the gentleman’s attitude, yet she could not pinpoint what
could be causing it. Recalling Jane’s recommendations --yet again--, Elizabeth concentrated
her efforts in searching a theme that might be of Darcy’s preference and
that could also satisfy her own curiosity for her future life. If Mr. Bingley
was not a suitable topic for him, then maybe he would be more inclined to
discuss his own sister. If that one did not manage to catch his interests
either, then it was time to drop the conversation entirely.
“I
have heard that your sister is a very accomplished young lady.” Elizabeth offered with a
conciliatory smile.
“She
is, indeed.”
“I
recall Miss Bingley saying that she plays the pianoforte exceedingly well. I
suppose she practices a good deal.”
“Undoubtedly,”
Darcy smiled with affectionate praise of his sister’s proficiency.
“She does practise very constantly. No excellence in music is to be
acquired without constant practice.”
Elizabeth raised an eyebrow,
wilfully understanding this comment as a subtle ill judgement of previous
performances of hers that he had had the chance to hear. The gentleman knew she
rarely practised as he had never seen her sitting at the pianoforte in these
days while he was a guest at her home.
But
Darcy’s interpretation of their conversation was an entirely different
one. To him, Elizabeth’s enquiries were a demonstration of her interest
for learning more about his life and not for what they truly were: a desperate
attempt at livening up a boring and unsubstantial colloquy with the man she was
about to wed and who was making not even the slightest effort in becoming more
acquainted with the likings of his future wife.
Increasingly
vexed by his aloofness, Elizabeth
made her last attempt. “Mr. Darcy, when am I going to be acquainted with
your excellent sister?”
“Soon.”
Elizabeth stared at him, her
annoyance now barely repressed. Apparently, her fiancée was not keen of this
subject either. If he did not want to talk, why should she importune him any
further? Turning her eyes to her needle work she replied with a brief,
“Right.”
Thus they
remained, in polite indifference, like a long time married couple that had nothing
to say to each other, until Mary announced supper was being served and the
couple removed themselves to the dining room.
<center>~ * ~</center>
The
morning of Darcy’s departure Elizabeth
received another dose of discomfort, again by her mother’s designs. Darcy
was politely saying his good-byes when Mrs. Bennet
scolded Elizabeth
while in his presence.
“Lizzy!, What are you doing there, child!” she shouted,
“What are you thinking that you are not walking your fiancée to his
carriage?” Mrs. Bennet pushed her daughter
closer to her betrothed. “Go, girl, go and give him a proper goodbye.
After all, the man came this far only to see you.”
Mr. Bennet pressed his palm to his cheek and shook his head. He
had indeed married the silliest woman in England.
“Mama!”
Elizabeth
blushed at her mother’s vulgarity. Darcy’s dislike at Mrs. Bennet’s poor choice of words also became painfully
evident in his features. Fearing another inappropriate suggestion or merely the
repetition of the previous one, Darcy offered Elizabeth his arm and spared his fiancée
further embarrassment.
“Would
you do me the honour of accompanying me to my carriage?” he said
wearily.
Elizabeth nodded, showing
him a brief, shy smile. As they reached the coach, Elizabeth noticed that her family had
deserted the porch in an attempt to give them some privacy. Despite the
apparent courteous gesture, she knew that such civility would not come without
a price and was certain that her mother –and probably her youngest
sisters, too—were hiding behind a curtain, spying each one of her moves.
And Elizabeth
was not willing to provide them with any sort of amusement at her expense and
hoped that her fiancée was of the same mind. But given her bad fortune of these
past days and the gentleman’s inclination for forwardness, Elizabeth doubted she
would have that luck.
But this
time fate seemed with her, as, against everything she had expected, Darcy did
not attempt to kiss her. He was all politeness and addressed her in his kindest
voice.
“My
dear Miss Bennet,” he smiled. “I know
that you are not entirely happy with this engagement, but under the
circumstances, I think that it would be best if we become better acquainted
with each other.”
She
sighed, relieved that he had been so thoughtful. “I know, sir. I beg you
to have patience and allow me some time to adjust. I will try my best in the
future.”
“So
will I, madam. I know my own behaviour to be completely lacking. I shall do my
best to convince you that I am not the ogre you believe I am. ”
Elizabeth
showed him a sad smile. “Have a safe trip, sir.”
“Thank
you.” Darcy took her hand and raised it to his lips, pressing a soft kiss
on her bare skin.
Somehow
disquieted by the unexpected gesture, with reddening cheeks, Elizabeth quickly
removed her hand from his grip and stepped back, allowing him room to climb on
his carriage. While able to appreciate his consideration and self control this
time, the brush of his mouth on her skin was enough to make her shivery and
left her wondering how it would have felt if it had been applied on her lips.
Indeed she was concerned with the involuntary fluttering of her heart whenever
the gentleman was around. One moment she was wishing he did not touch her and
the next she was hoping he would!
Darcy
noticed her obvious confusion and found the sudden blush exceedingly becoming.
He reckoned it would still take some time, but he knew he was on the right path
to win his lady’s heart.