Chapter
16
Elizabeth walked through the
grounds of Pemberley with a radiant smile. Before her an impressive park
unfolded in an explosion of greens, where trees and plants blossomed in
colourful frenzy creating a vision that seemed to be formed in Heaven. Never in
her life had she imagined she would fall in love with a place but she had,
helplessly, with her husband’s magnificent property. Everything at
Pemberley was beautiful, fascinating. The manor, the grounds, the woods, every
single room, every piece of furniture and adornment.
These first days at
Pemberley had opened Elizabeth’s
heart and mind. A new warmth was spreading inside of her, finally displacing
those old sentiments of dissatisfaction and bitterness that she had harboured
inside her chest since her engagement to Darcy was announced. But it was not
merely the house that inspired these much richer and positive feelings in her;
the master of the estate --her husband-- was also greatly responsible for this
radical change in her disposition. Her life at Pemberley, as brief as it had
been, had allowed her to see a different side of him which she had not had the
chance to witness before and that had helped her to understand him better.
Being raised in such grandeur could make anyone develop a strong sense of pride
and superiority. And Darcy was very proud of his ancestral home, of his name an
his origins. Yet, despite his fortune and power and with a battalion of
servants ready to grant him even his smallest wish, Darcy was not as spoiled or
arrogant as he could have been. There was a certain severity in his demeanour,
an air of ascendancy and distinction that could not be refuted, but Elizabeth considered it
according to his stature of master of such a grand estate. He was responsible
for so many things and so many lives that someone with half his sense of duty
and commitment would have felt overwhelmed by the enormous responsibility that
lay over his shoulders.
It was here at
Pemberley where Elizabeth
received a more detailed insight about her husband’s life and character.
Mrs. Reynolds, the housekeeper, was all praise for her dear master. In their
meetings, while introducing the mistress to the particulars of the
household’s administration, Mrs. Reynolds acquainted Elizabeth with glimpses of Darcy’s
childhood and youth. She learned the sorrow he had felt when the previous Mrs.
Darcy died and how quiet and reserved Darcy had grown when his father followed
barely a year later.
“It must have been
difficult for him to take care of a young girl and this estate at such young
age.”
“Indeed it was. He was
not 23 when that happened,” said the housekeeper. “But he is very
determined and faced his responsibility with the same strength and
determination he has always shown.”
“Mrs Turner told me he
was a very nice-tempered child.”
“Yes, Madam. He was
always the sweetest-tempered, most generous-hearted boy in the world.” Elizabeth smiled in
acknowledgement. “I have never had a cross word from him, and I have
known him since he was four years old. And he has grown into this handsome, fine
man. Some people call him proud; but I am sure I never saw any of it. To my fancy, it is only because he does not
rattle away like other young men.”
How different this sounded now
that she knew him better! A month ago, when Mrs. Turner had told her these same
things, Elizabeth
had refused to acknowledge them as true. For her, Darcy had always been
ill-tempered, capricious and selfish. She had rejected any notification of his
good character as false and any sort of praise was discarded as untruthful. But
now, barely one month later, she found herself desirous to learn more about
this man that was captivating her heart; about the husband that she was growing
to love.
The first week at
Pemberley had been quite busy for the new mistress. Not only Mrs. Reynolds had
kept her occupied with household matters, but Elizabeth had also been immersed
–together with Georgiana- in the planning of one of the traditions of the
estate: the distribution of grain and baskets among the tenants for the
beginning of the sowing time.
Elizabeth had never felt so
useful in her life. The amount of grain that was distributed was considerable,
as were the baskets of food and fruit for the families. Every thing was
received with great joy. She spent a wonderful day touring the estate in the
phaeton, with Miss Darcy, going from one farm to another, conversing with the
tenants and learning more about their families and lives. It did not surprise
her now that the Darcys were so respected and admired by those who depended on
them. Her arrival was received with enthusiasm and she was welcomed with praise
and good wishes on her marriage to the master.
The festivities lasted until
the following day when all the tenants and families that resided at Pemberley
were invited to a picnic, courtesy of the master of the estate. The gathering
was in the southern meadow that was destined for the plantation of wheat where
the so anticipated race of ploughs that Georgiana had described while they were
still in London
took place. Darcy was an eager observer and an enthusiastic applauder of the
winner.
Darcy did partake in the log
cutting contest, obtaining an honourable 2nd place to the region’s most
famous woodcutter, Mr. Sims, also known as Big Tom. As he returned to their
spot under a large tree, the Master of Pemberley received the cheerful applause
of his wife and sister who celebrated his near victory. His trophy was a well
needed glass of lemonade handed by his wife.
With all contests done, the
families settled on their blankets to proceed with the picnic. They were all
having a wonderful time. The day was pleasant, sunny and the conversation
cordial. A lover of the outdoors and populous events, Elizabeth felt this was one of the happiest
days she had had in months.
The members of Darcy family
rested on their spot, observing the picturesque image children playing the
field. Elizabeth who had planned an extra entertainment for the day, called her
sister’s attention with a …
“Georgiana, have you
ever flown a kite?”
Miss Darcy looked at her with
a diverted smile. “No, I had not had that pleasure.”
Elizabeth rose quickly.
“Then I will be happy to instruct you. Come with me.”
The eyes of both brother and
sister followed her as she walked around the tree until she returned with the
rhomboidal artefact she loaded in the coach with the rest of their things that
morning. Grinning like a child, Elizabeth
passed by them with her precious cargo and took her sister’s hand,
dragging down to the meadow with her. Smiling broadly himself, Darcy observed
his dearest ladies scampering down the hill with the blue kite in hand. It was
excessively diverting to watch them, so happy and alive with the colourful
contraption flapping behind them.
“Mr
Darcy!” Elizabeth
called him. “Are you not coming?”
That was an
invitation he could not refuse, so Darcy followed his wife’s lead at a
lazy pace, more inclined to enjoy the pleasure of watching her play with the
kite than flying the thing himself. Elizabeth
was undoubtedly a runner, Darcy observed with mirth, and let out a chuckle as
she gained the speed necessary to elevate the kite high in the sky, task that
was performed effortlessly. Everyone seemed delighted with this new
entertainment she was offering them, especially the children. The tenants and
their families fell in love with her liveliness and spontaneity while the
master of estate was happy just with watching her merriment.
Once the kite was
doing twists and turns in the air, Elizabeth
passed it to Georgiana, who following her sister’s instructions, learned
the particularities of kite flying. They were engaged in the task for nearly
half an hour, and then passed the kite to one of the older boys that were
gathered around them.
The ladies returned
to their place under the tree to refresh themselves after the exertion. This
time Darcy returned her the courtesy and served his athletic wife a cold drink.
“Madam,”
he said smilingly as they sat on the blanket that was laid on the grass for
them under the shadow of the tree, “I did not know that flying kites was
one of your many accomplishments. That was indeed beautiful.”
“Thank
you.” Elizabeth
smiled brightly at her husband. She had feared that he would find the activity
unladylike, or inappropriate for the mistress of his estate, but it had been the
opposite, and she was grateful that he had not been offended by her conduct.
“My father taught me when I was a child. He always wanted to have a son
and when he suffered his fifth disappointment, he instructed me on some of the
many activities he would have liked to share with a boy. Flying kites was one
of them.”
“That leaves
me to wonder what other exertions that are usually reserved to men you are able
to perform.”
“I fear this
is the only one, sir. I am terribly afraid of weapons and I find fishing exceedingly
boring.”
“Do you not
ride?” Darcy enquired with interest. Perhaps one day they could ride
together around the estate.
“No, sir, I
do not. Jane is the rider of the family. My father tried to teach me when I was
little, but I had a fall and I have refused to sit atop a horse ever since.
Walking is so much safer, and more invigorating, I dare say.”
“But so
tiresome!” Georgiana laughed. “I could teach you, Elizabeth, or
William might, he’s an excellent horseman. I am most certain that there
is a suitable horse here at Pemberley for you. What say you, brother?”
Darcy stole a
glance in his wife’s direction and noticed her evident displeasure for
the activity Georgiana was proposing. Albeit he would have loved to educate her
in the art of horseback riding, he could not force her if that was not her
inclination. “I would be happy to instruct you, Mrs. Darcy, but only if
you are agreeable with it.”
“Sir, I thank
you, but I fear I must decline,” Elizabeth
said with some apprehension as she did not want him to feel slighted after his
kind offer. “But be certain that if one day I find myself in the
necessity to learn, I will readily ask you to teach me.”
“It will be
my pleasure,” he said with a smile.
The Darcy family
remained under the tree nibbling the cold meat and fruits that had been
prepared especially for the day which had been a wonderful day so far. They had
been blessed with excellent weather and Elizabeth
commented on their good fortune.
“Indeed, we
have been very lucky,” Darcy replied as his eyes remained on the meadow,
his interest caught by the families that were sharing this picnic with them.
“I did not know that the Simpson’s baby was already born.”
“Oh,
yes,” Elizabeth
looked at the group, sitting slightly a part from the rest, under the shadow of
a tree. “About a fortnight ago. I met them yesterday. I believe this is
their fifth child.”
“It
is,” Darcy observed with a frown. “Mr. Simpson is a good man but
has been unlucky with his crops during the last two seasons. I heard their cow
died this winter.”
“Oh, how
unfortunate.” Elizabeth
commented.
“I will speak
to Mr. Rawson. We can lend them one of our milking cows for the summer. With
the baby and so many small children, they will certainly need it.”
“That is very
generous of you,” Elizabeth
appreciated his gesture. Her husband was indeed a liberal and generous
landlord.
“They have
always been excellent tenants. His family has been working our land for many
years now, it’s the least I can do for them. I know that we can come up
with a fair arrangement.” Darcy moved back his body until he was reclined
on one elbow on the blanket.
As he did this, Elizabeth’s
attention was drawn to his form, so long and fit. Her eyes travelled his body,
from feet to head, and she was particularly delighted by the effect that the
soft breeze produced in his hair. There was something boyish about his
appearance today, perhaps his sport clothes were making him look younger or
maybe it was easiness in his manners that she found increasingly appealing. He
seemed entertained by the sight of a group of children that were playing in the
field; he was smiling pleasantly and let out a chuckle when the boys fell in a
tangle of legs and arms during their playful wrestle. Elizabeth could not take his eyes off her
husband and was caught completely unprepared when he suddenly glanced at her
and saw her staring at him.
She quickly averted
her eyes, then looked back again only to find that his eyes were still fixed on
her. With great agitation, she realized that she was blushing intently and
prayed that he would attribute her heightened colour to the sun and the breeze.
Butterflies played in her stomach and her heartbeat became uncommonly fast. The
smile she showed him was the shyest one and the one that he gave her in
response was slow … unusual, different to any she had seen before. At
length, he looked away, leaving Elizabeth
to meditate about the confusion she suddenly felt.
Two weeks had
passed since Elizabeth
arrived at Pemberley. Two weeks of discovery, of growth, of feelings blossoming
like the trees in the spring.
Elizabeth was now possessed
by emotions that were as enticing as they were disquieting. She was happy, but
at the same time anxious, restless, afraid. The reason for these contradictory
sentiments? Her husband, of course. He was the object of her dreams during the
night and the only thing she could think about while she was awake.
Her change of mind
was not the consequence of these last days in his society. It came to happen
gradually, and was nesting firmly inside her chest. The mere presence of her
husband made her feel warm and her heart skipped a beat whenever Darcy bestowed
upon her one of his charming smiles. She now found herself seeking his company
and learning more about his tastes and costumes in order to find new ways to
promote his happiness. Could this be love? Elizabeth asked herself, almost dismissing
the possibility. How could it be love when she had felt so strongly against him
in the past?
However, as
impossible as Elizabeth
believed it to be, these sentiments she had been developing steadily and
systematically since she received Darcy’s first letter were now turning
into the deepest affection. Her condition was undeniable and she was now ready
to admit that she was helplessly in love with him. This made her feel
vulnerable, insecure, lost, for it was not the acknowledgement of her own heart
what troubled her, but the unawareness of his. After so many fights and
misunderstandings, of wounding words exchanged in a fit of anger, she could not
expect him to hold her in the same estimation.
Darcy had loved her once, but what if this feeling had been destroyed by
her past offences?
His current demeanour
did not give her a clue of where his heart resided. Darcy was civil,
considerate and polite, a perfect gentleman whose actions spoke of correction
and propriety, but there were no signs that the passion he had declared to feel
for her still existed. Occasionally, he would touch her hand during a morning
walk, there were times when she felt his intense gaze upon her, when she could
intuit glimpses of desire in his eyes, but those looks vanished before could
she could decipher what they truly meant. He had never tried to kiss her again
and she feared now that he never would.
How could she win
back the affection of a man that was so uncivilly rejected? Was this a hopeless
case? She was completely at loss of what to do and sighed in helplessness at
her inability to think properly in what her husband was concerned.
“That was a
big sigh, Mrs. Darcy.”
Elizabeth startled and
looked at the entrance where she saw the object of her musings leaning against
the doorframe of the morning room.
“Mr. Darcy!”
“Is anything
the matter? You seem … preoccupied.” He left his post and walked
slowly towards her.
“I am all
right, sir.” She rose from the settee where she had been sitting.
“I hope you
are not displeased with Pemberley.”
“No, not at
all.”
“Do you like your new home, then?”
Darcy stopped in
front of her. His eyes went to her bosom, where he noticed the gold, heart
shaped pendant he gave her during their engagement and that she had never worn
before. A placid smile graced his countenance in appreciation at the
unprecedented event. He was enticed to trace the golden chain with his fingers
but immediately recognized the imprudence of such a move and recoiled, clasping
both hands behind his back to avoid temptation, and lifted his eyes so she
found his stare disrespectful.
“Yes, I
do.” Elizabeth
blushed, aware of his eyes scrutinizing her. “There are very few who
would not approve.”
“But your
good opinion is rarely bestowed and therefore more worth the earning,” he
stated with a smile.
“Thank
you.” As a way to distract herself from his unnerving presence, Elizabeth turned to the
settee, where she had left her embroidery. “There is something I wanted
to give you … I … I have been working on … here,” she
picked the cloth up. “I have a present for you.”
“For
me?” he asked, the dimples he rarely showed now in full display.
“I started
this while you were away, but with the trip and the picnic I was not able to
finish it until today.” With trembling fingers and a shy smile, she gave
him the pristine cloth she had embroidered for him.
Darcy’s
fingertips brushed her hand as he took the piece to examine the delicate
handwork. “It is beautiful. I have never received such lovely gift. I
thank you.”
Elizabeth almost jumped at
the contact, and made a conscious effort not to withdraw her hand too quickly.
Truly, she did not know what was happening to her. Her face felt hot and her
heart was beating so loud that she feared Darcy would hear it from where he
stood. She knew he was staring at her, but she just could not bring herself to
look up. When she finally dared to glance at him, she saw his eyes shining
brightly. Their gazes locked, the moment froze in time and for an instant, Elizabeth thought he
might …
“Mr.
Darcy.” Mrs. Reynolds’ voice startled them both.
“Yes?” Darcy turned towards his housekeeper.
“Your
carriage is ready, sir.”
“Thank you,
Mrs. Reynolds.” He then addressed his wife. “I am going to Lambton
on some business; I thought that perhaps you would like to accompany me.”
“That would
be agreeable, yes,” said she when she found her voice. “I shall ask
Georgiana if she would like to come with us.”
Elizabeth’s
suggestion, voiced out of pure nervousness for the prospect of being alone with
him, ruined her husband’s expectations about a ride to the village in the
sole company of his adorable wife. He had thought that after the intimate
moment they shared in the ride to Pemberley Elizabeth would be more receptive
of his person, in fact he had noticed a substantial change in her demeanour
since they arrived at Derbyshire, and harboured expectations about beginning a
slow and subtle courtship. Sharing a pleasant ride with her in the narrowness
of the phaeton, on the lovely road to Lambton –so propitious for
romanticism-- would have been the perfect opportunity to start. However, this
sudden refusal to be alone with him warned him that he might have made the
wrong assumptions. Certainly the inclusion of a third person in their party was
a clear indication of her unwillingness to spend an un-chaperoned time with
him. Sighing at the wasted opportunity, Darcy watched her leave the room
hastily, finding consolation in the fact that at least he had obtained a
beautiful token from her this day. He carefully folded the cloth and put it
away in his breast pocket, very close to his heart.
Once in Lambton,
Darcy left the ladies at the milliner and went to attend some business with his
solicitor. He joined them an hour later for a walk around the village. In the
street, a gentleman approached them. He was a large man, Elizabeth noticed, who seemed to be very well
acquainted with her husband and sister.
“Darcy! What
a pleasure to see you again!”
“Lord
Archer,” he bowed.
The gentlemen
exchanged pleasantries and polite inquiries about their health and families
were made. When Lord Archer greeted Georgiana, he expressed his surprise on
seeing how much grown she was since he had last seen her. His eyes then went to
the third person in the party, waiting for an introduction.
“My
lord,” Darcy stated with solemnity, “Allow me to introduce you to
my …” he stopped to clear his throat, “Mrs. Elizabeth Darcy.
We married two months ago. Mrs. Darcy, Lord Archer’s estate neighbours
ours on the east.”
Elizabeth dropped a
courtesy. “It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, my lord.”
“Oh yes, I
have heard the news! Congratulations, my friend!” Lord Archer said
effusively. “But this is not done, Darcy, you married two months ago and
kept her all for yourself?” He took Elizabeth’s
hand and kissed it gallantly. “My dear Mrs. Darcy. I am delighted to make
your acquaintance. This happy event deserves a celebration. I shall ask Lady
Archer to send round an invitation for dinner. I am sure that she will be
enchanted to meet the young lady that has conquered Mr Darcy’s
heart.”
“The pleasure
will be mine,” Elizabeth
replied politely.
The gentlemen
conversed a little longer, mostly about matters concerning their estates, until
Lord Archer announced his leave. “Well, I shall leave you now. I hope we
would see each other again soon.”
Lord Archer was
gone and Elizabeth
was left to meditate about what just happened. With great consternation, she
realized that her husband had purposely avoided the word ‘wife’
during the introduction with the other gentleman. ‘I may be married to you, but I will never be your wife’ she told him on their wedding night. She
never imagined her words would be taken in such a way! Oh, how much pain he had caused him! Elizabeth was deeply mortified and consumed
by remorse. Would he ever be able to forgive her?
“Is there any
other place you would wish to go?” Darcy’s voice distracted her out
of her thoughts.
“Oh,
no,” Elizabeth
replied. “We can go back now.”
He observed her for a moment,
as if studying her, with an almost imperceptible frown on his brow, but said
nothing else. He offered his arm
to her and they walked to the carriage.